Sunday, December 27, 2009
Thursday, December 24, 2009
Sunday, December 20, 2009
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
a man walked into a hair store. The hair store said "may i see you ID?" the hair store noticed the hair color on the ID did not match his actual hair color. The long shiny lady in the corner started making smoke from the creases in her forehead. The man pretended not to notice because he felt it was rude to stare at rude people. It was a special day, the man had just become the proud father of a golden belbin troll. the shiny lady was still smoking and started dribbling..........a basket ball. the hair store told her she was disturbing the customers and that the customers were disturbing the hair store. Shiny lady grew chest hair and drank 5 anti energy drinks and procceded to slam dunk her basket ball into the mans ear drum. In slow motion he colapsed into himself like bear trap. The basket ball wasnt like any normal basket ball this one was shaped just like the earth. It was dark inside his ear, the stars were out and the basket ball floated. Shiny lady said let there be light. and she saw it was good.
Monday, December 7, 2009
Sunday, December 6, 2009
way big
yesterday i got up in the morning to get food.
i went to the bar and got beer and and chicken wraps. I then went to this place and got a charlie sheen action movie. so i had 1 bag of vhs and another bag of food(i did not finish the chicken) my pants were falling off while i was walking home. I saw this chinese lady that was all old so i went to pull my pants up. I then noticed my dick was out of my pants. She scurried to china town mumbling wow that was way bigger then wil Manville.
Jordan.
i went to the bar and got beer and and chicken wraps. I then went to this place and got a charlie sheen action movie. so i had 1 bag of vhs and another bag of food(i did not finish the chicken) my pants were falling off while i was walking home. I saw this chinese lady that was all old so i went to pull my pants up. I then noticed my dick was out of my pants. She scurried to china town mumbling wow that was way bigger then wil Manville.
Jordan.
Friday, December 4, 2009
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Monday, November 23, 2009
poems for the creatures
i saw a hummingbird nest. i wanted to make the birds fly so i threw a bat. they all died.
rattlesnake rattlesnake. you cant fuck with my shit. shotgun son.
it was a cold dark night. I slept with a rat. My feet made it die.
i was hunting lizard. i was hunting hard i fliped a log. the lizard smashed like a pancake.
zebra lady you had it good. desert bushes abounding. those dogs tooke your vagina and eye.
A seagul and a flying rock meet in the sky. The rock wins. Rock always wins.
one time i had a kitchen glove that looked like a trout. a turtle bite it. the turtle couldnt hold long.
two crows went two yosemite national park. they were making out in front of half dome. I watched.
the lizard was on the tree. it was a hot summer day. He got soaked in urine. it was cool and refreshing
those horses couldn't have any more offspring. The man came. I took a picture of the balls on my cellphone.
my mom bought a fake owl to scare away all the hot weather predators. a real owl came and tried to put the moves on the poser owl. the ants ate it.
this african fish was all gnarly. it had this sicst that grew worms out its forhead.
i was a marine saltwater fish enthusiast as a youngin'. I had beautiful creatures of mysticism. The secret crab grew from the live rock and ate the coral and the fish. The tank was destroyed with bleach.
there was this pug dog i gave it 7 bowls of bailys.it pissed itself in bed.
Dexter, my best homies dog. You ruled that one time we were all drinkin beer out of the beer bong and you licked up the foam. You were wasted dude, pukin all over the pool tile.
rattlesnake rattlesnake. you cant fuck with my shit. shotgun son.
it was a cold dark night. I slept with a rat. My feet made it die.
i was hunting lizard. i was hunting hard i fliped a log. the lizard smashed like a pancake.
zebra lady you had it good. desert bushes abounding. those dogs tooke your vagina and eye.
A seagul and a flying rock meet in the sky. The rock wins. Rock always wins.
one time i had a kitchen glove that looked like a trout. a turtle bite it. the turtle couldnt hold long.
two crows went two yosemite national park. they were making out in front of half dome. I watched.
the lizard was on the tree. it was a hot summer day. He got soaked in urine. it was cool and refreshing
those horses couldn't have any more offspring. The man came. I took a picture of the balls on my cellphone.
my mom bought a fake owl to scare away all the hot weather predators. a real owl came and tried to put the moves on the poser owl. the ants ate it.
this african fish was all gnarly. it had this sicst that grew worms out its forhead.
i was a marine saltwater fish enthusiast as a youngin'. I had beautiful creatures of mysticism. The secret crab grew from the live rock and ate the coral and the fish. The tank was destroyed with bleach.
there was this pug dog i gave it 7 bowls of bailys.it pissed itself in bed.
Dexter, my best homies dog. You ruled that one time we were all drinkin beer out of the beer bong and you licked up the foam. You were wasted dude, pukin all over the pool tile.
Sunday, November 22, 2009
Thursday, November 19, 2009
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
poems by Jordan
Have you ever met me? No you haven’t and you might wonder who I am. I will give you a clue. I usually use this computer to look at naked chicks doing dirty things with there assholes. You don’t know yet? Could this be your uncle Steve who works as maintenance in a trailer park? No fuck you.
In the bottom of the dungeon, I take bong rips. Its my destiny bro.
Grabbin fat tits like they were hamburgers
Pushing fat girls in bushs were you just pissed
nothing else is cool
Monday, November 16, 2009
Friday, November 13, 2009
welcome to BoobMansion
we are located on boss street, if you dont know that street then fuck you.
the residents of the mansion consist of handsome dudes, Jordan, Henry, Fat chris, Jamie, dingelbarry quin, and drunk trevin.
the residents of the mansion consist of handsome dudes, Jordan, Henry, Fat chris, Jamie, dingelbarry quin, and drunk trevin.
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